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There is a way people speak about weight that sounds like a problem to solve. They say it like they're carrying something separate from themselves, something that could be set down, if only they knew the right way to let go. But I have learned - and a friend of mine named Zyazal, someone I know only through messages across a long distance, someone I have never stood in the same room with but have come to trust in the dark between us, is learning it now too - that this is not quite how it works.